Clean Up Your LNT Act with a Backcountry Bidet

Pooping: one of life’s purest simple joys. Performing the act in the backcountry is one thing, but cleaning yourself afterward is something else. In the woods there’s no privacy, no sink and no porcelain throne to do your business on. And, if you’re willing to take a backcountry bidet with you on your next trip, there won’t be any toilet paper (TP) either.

Don’t be alarmed. Using a backcountry bidet might sound like a mess waiting to happen, but frontcountry bidet users know: by choosing a bidet system over toilet paper you will be cleaner, pack less, and reduce your impact on the environment by adopting a new bathroom habit.

Knowing the ins and outs of your body is a crucial component of backcountry hygiene and comfort. Having a plan before you have to go helps. Photo by Joseph Gonzalez

Practicing proper hygiene is a backcountry skill. Just like taking care of your feet will prevent blisters, taking care of yourself *ahem* down there will prevent a ton of chaffing and discomfort. All of the sweat and dirt your booty has been exposed to after a long day of hiking accumulates. Add in any residual matter you may not have fully cleaned-up during your last bathroom visit, and you’re looking at a layer of sun-don’t-shine-friction that will cause you to chafe with discomfort once you start walking again. You would take preventative measures to avoid hiking with blisters on your feet, so why not do the same to avoid a raw behind?

Leave No Trace and no toilet paper

Did you know toilet paper can take years to decompose? That’s why the preferred Leave No Trace (LNT) practice is to pack out your soiled TP. If you don’t, your dirty bathroom tissue runs the risk of being dug up by animals, even if you buried it in a proper 6-8 inch cathole. We’ve all seen these “toilet paper blooms” on the side of trails, especially in highly trafficked areas or arid environments. This backcountry malpractice is enough to make the toughest hiker feel queasy.

A traditional backcountry bathroom kit. You can slowly wean yourself into the bidet system by only bringing a little bit of toilet paper on your next trip, aka TP roulette. Photo by Joseph Gonzalez

Even hikers who already double zip-lock their used TP and pack it out might prefer the bidet system. Who really wants to carry around a bag of used toilet paper, slowly adding to it day after day as it cooks in the sun on your hiking trip? No toilet paper = no problem.

• More bathroom reading
• - How to Use the Bathroom Outside
• - How to Poop in the Woods
• - A Drop in the Bucket: The poop problem in our backcountry

Instead, the water from a bidet will seep into the ground (ideally over your cathole or a privy box) and help break down the waste left there. That way you can leave your waste, and the anxiety of not having enough TP, behind.

Know before you go

Here’s what you need to know before you try the backcountry bidet method:

• There’s a learning curve. You might not nail it the first time, so consider practicing in a controlled environment before you head into the great wide-open.
• Using this technique means you’ll be getting to know yourself better than ever before. Relish this opportunity to learn something new about your body and try not to think about germs too much.
• Keep ample hand sanitizer or soap handy. You’ll know why shortly.
• Pro-tip: keep your fingernails short for maximum efficiency and cleanliness.

Materials

Hand sanitizer and an ultralight trowel are optional, but highly recommended. Photo by Joseph Gonzalez

• A selection of the bidet tools out there
• - Culo Clean
• - Holy Hiker
• - UYICOO
• - Hygienna Solo
• - Happy Bottom

• Six + ounces of water
• One water bottle
• This can be a 6-8 ounce squirt bottle or a rigid 20-32 ounce plastic water bottle
• If you choose to multipurpose a plastic water bottle, you’ll need a bidet nozzle attachment
• Natural materials
• Hand sanitizer
• Optional: one drop of Dr. Bronner’s
• Optional: a couple of squares of TP or a wet-wipe (all must be packed out)

How-to use the backcountry bidet method on trail

Each nozzle has a different pressure level and trajectory. Choose wisely and practice at home. Photo by Joseph Gonzalez

Now that you’ve had your morning coffee, found a nice private area 200 feet away from trails, campsites and water sources, and are visiting the backcountry toilet or have dug a cathole 6-8 inches deep, we can get started. Drop your drawers and start your engines:

• The 5 Star Poop System has been used for years to help promote comfortable backcountry BMs. What’s your high score?
• - 1 star: a nice poop
• - 2 stars: a nice poop with a view
• - 3 stars: a nice poop with a view and you see an animal
• - 4 stars: a nice poop with a view and you see an animal pooping as well
• - 5 stars: a nice poop with a view and you make eye contact with an animal as you're both pooping

1. Do what you do best
2. Take some natural materials and gently wipe. Ideally, these materials will do most of the heavy lifting for you, so don’t be shy. Smooth rocks and sticks work great, but broad-leafed plants like lamb’s ear or mule’s ear are best. Leave these in the cathole with your business. (Pro tip: if it’s soft enough for the cheeks on your face, it’s soft enough for your cheeks down under.)
3. Position your squirt bottle below your rear in a way where the water trajectory hits your sweet spots, but so the top of the bottle and your hand are outside of the splash zone.
   • If you went the Dr. Bronner’s route, add a drop of soap to your squirt bottle and agitate it before this step. Squeeze your bottle hard enough so the water pressure-washes your backside from top to bottom. Imagine it as a laser, knocking loose any debris uncollected from your wipes with natural materials. Leaning forward a bit helps.
4. Use your hand to gently scrub the affected area to cleanse any remaining residue. Don’t be shy.
   • If you brought toilet paper or wet ones, you can now do an “insurance” wipe (you should always do an insurance wipe in the front country, too. If you know, you know).
   • Hiking in the shoulder season? Snow is a brisk wake-up, but it can definitely help you get clean.
5. Those who carry pee rags can pat themselves dry. Otherwise, give yourself a little wiggle to dry off a bit.
6. With your clean hand, squirt hand sanitizer into your dirty hand and do a one-hand wash. After that, do another squirt of hand sanitizer and wash with both hands.
7. Pull your drawers up and get back to hiking! It might feel uncomfortable having a wet booty, but it should dry quickly enough.

Give this clean, ultralight habit a try

So long as you’re clean, comfortable and follow proper LNT ethics, there’s no wrong way to do your business. However, if you’re hoping to take your bathroom hiking set-up to the next level, consider giving the bidet a try. Not only will you get cleaner, meaning you’ll hike longer and more comfortably, but you’ll also reduce your impact on the environment by using less toilet paper.

WTA's land manager partners handle privy maintenance 99% of the time, but on the rare occasion we get to help too. Photo by Evelyn Hall

After all, Everyone Poops — all 7.88 billion of us — but not everyone uses a bidet. Backcountry bidet practices might feel like a lot to digest, but with a bit of patience and bravery, you too can adopt this clean, ultralight hiking habit. Once you try it, paper just won’t rub the same again!

What advice would you give someone looking to transition to using a backcountry bidet? Did we miss a spot?